How to Embrace Change : From “That’s Just the Way I Am” to “Lets do it”

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Embrace Change: Growth Mindset

We’ve all heard it, maybe even said it ourselves: “That’s just the way I am.”

One of my favourite lines, especially when my kids urge me to try something new, is “That’s the way I am.”

It’s a comforting shield, providing consistency in a changing world

However, a recent experience with my daughter taught me a valuable lesson about the power of stepping out of my comfort zone and embracing change.

 The Magic Beads

The turning point for me came when my daughter expressed her desire to bead her hair and mine as well.

She excitedly suggested we twin our hairstyles. My initial reaction was one of reluctance, clinging to my usual excuse: “That’s the way I am.”

I had never considered experimenting with my hair in such a way, and the thought of it felt uncomfortable.

But my daughter’s enthusiasm was contagious, and I found myself reluctantly relenting.

As my daughter worked on beading our hair, something happened.

I felt a sense of transformation, not just in my appearance but in my outlook.

The beads, which my daughter referred to as “magic beads,” seemed to unlock a fun and playful side of me that had been dormant for years.

I felt like a different person, and the experience was surprisingly enjoyable.

The simple act of trying something new had an immediate impact on my mood and perspective.

Suddenly, I was willing to experiment more.

It was a powerful reminder that stepping out of our comfort zones can lead to unexpected joy and personal growth.

The beads may have been small and seemingly insignificant, but they represented a willingness to break free from self-imposed limitations and discover who I am.

HOW TO GLOW UP MENTALLY

From Tendencies to Transformation: Reframing Personality

“That’s just the way I am” is a missed opportunity for growth. Personality is not your destiny. It is your tendency. No one is limited to a single way of thinking, feeling, or acting. Who you become is not about the traits you have. It’s what you decide to do with them.”

Adam Grant

Grant argues that personality is not our destiny, but rather our tendency.

We all have ingrained traits, preferences, and behaviours.

Some of us are introverts, others are extroverts.

Some are naturally organized, while others thrive in chaos.

These tendencies shape who we are, but they do not define who we can become.

The key lies in recognizing the difference between a tendency and a limitation.

Just because you tend to be shy does not mean you cannot practice public speaking.

If you are disorganized by nature, you can still develop systems to keep your life in order.

Our personalities are not shackles; they are the clay we mold to create ourselves.

Embrace Change: The Power of Choice

My daughter’s “magic beads” were not magical at all.

The real magic happened within me.

By choosing to step outside my comfort zone, I discovered a hidden joy and the courage to experiment.

This experience highlights the power of choice in shaping our personalities.

We can choose to react automatically based on our tendencies, or we can consciously decide to act differently.

TO ALL MOMS WITH LOVE

Putting It into Practice : Steps to Embrace Change

So, how do we translate this to actionable steps?

Here is how to unleash the “magic beads” within yourself and embrace change.

Identify Your “That’s Just the Way I Am” Moments:

Pay attention to situations where you find yourself using this phrase.

Is it a fear of public speaking?

A resistance to trying new things?

Recognizing these moments is the first step to breaking free.

Embrace the Challenge:

Stepping outside your comfort zone can feel daunting.

Reframe it as an exciting opportunity for growth.

Celebrate Small Wins:

Change takes time.

Acknowledge and celebrate your progress, no matter how small.

This keeps you motivated and reinforces the positive feedback loop.

Find a Support System:

Surround yourself with people who encourage your growth.

Having an accountability partner or joining a support group can make a world of difference.

These individuals can celebrate your victories, offer encouragement during setbacks, and hold you accountable for your goals.

Seek Out Inspiration:

Immerse yourself in the stories of others who have embraced change and growth.

Read biographies, listen to podcasts, or watch documentaries about individuals who have reinvented themselves.

Their journeys can provide valuable inspiration and fuel your own motivation.

Practice Self-Compassion:

Change is not always easy.

There will be times when you stumble or fall back into old habits. 

Be kind to yourself during these moments. 

Self-compassion allows you to learn from setbacks and get back on track without getting discouraged.

Focus on Progress, Not Perfection:

Avoid becoming overwhelmed by the pursuit of perfection. 

Instead, celebrate your progress, no matter how small. 

Every step forward, every challenge overcome, brings you closer to the person you want to become.

Reframing: Shifting Your Perspective on Challenges

One of the most powerful tools for growth is reframing.

Reframing involves changing the way you perceive a situation or challenge. 

Here are some strategies to use reframing for growth:

Challenge Becomes Opportunity:

Rather than seeing challenges as obstacles, view them as chances to learn and grow.

Challenges push us to develop new skills and move beyond our comfort zones.

Fear Becomes Excitement:

When fear comes up, see it as excitement for growth.

Use the adrenaline as energy to take action.

We all make mistakes.

Instead of seeing failure as a setback, view it as a learning opportunity.

Understand what went wrong, and use that insight to improve next time.

The Power of Small Changes

The beading episode with my daughter showed the power of small changes in shifting our perceptions and behaviours.

It was not a drastic or life-changing event, but it significantly impacted my openness to embrace change.

Small steps can lead to bigger transformations over time.

If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and keep on learning.

That way, their children don’t have to be slaves of praise.

They will have a lifelong way to build and repair their own confidence.

Carol S.Dweck

Encouraging Growth in Others

As parents, one of our roles is to encourage growth and development in our children.

By embracing change and trying new things, we can inspire our kids to do the same.

Our actions speak louder than words.

When they see us stepping out of our comfort zones, they are more likely to follow.

Supporting their curiosity and exploration helps them develop resilience and adaptability.

My daughter’s request to bead our hair was a simple yet transformative experience that taught me the importance of stepping out of my comfort zone.

It showed me that “That’s the way I am” is not fixed but can be reshaped by our actions and choices.

Adopting change and growth means challenging our perceptions and trying new things, which helps us discover new aspects of ourselves.

So, the next time you find yourself clinging to the familiar, remember the ‘magic beads and be open to embrace change.

Are you ready to step out of your comfort zone and embrace change and growth ?

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